Confessions of a Car Man

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The Gentlemanly Art Of The Turn

It was late in the day on a busy Saturday when the turn was offered to me. I knew that everyone was busy except for me, and that made me feel a little like a deer caught in the headlights. Jim, the salesmen in question, was new to our crew, still an unknown quantity to a certain extent, but during his short time at the dealership it was rumored that his turns were garbage.

I had just delivered a car, but there was still time left in the day to snag another buyer. So that made me more than hesitant when Jim approached me. But he looked desperate. He was up to his eyeballs in customers and needed help. I gave in.

Stupid me.

It was one of those watermark moments in my automotive career: the worst turn I’ve ever had. After talking with his customer for only a couple of minutes I realized I’d been had. I can’t remember the details; I appear to have blocked them out, except that they were truly horrendous. I was left confused. We Car Men can be a screwed up bunch no doubt, but when it comes to turning a customer we at least try to be honorable. We are all aware that we are screwing around with another guy’s living, so when you have to give up a customer there had better be at least a chance that the other guy can put a deal together.

Not so with Jim. It soon became apparent to all of us that Jim didn’t turn a deal because he thought there was a deal there. He turned the deal because he was certain there wasn’t a deal there! Pardon my French, but he didn’t give a fuck about you or the time you would spend spinning your wheels with someone who had no way to go. I have never met anyone before or since who was worse than Jim!

You want to hear the weird part? If Jim turned you a deal and by some miracle you made it—he was disappointed. In his mind he didn’t get a half deal, he lost a half deal!

Turning a deal, or a T.O. as it’s called, is a basic car business institution. There are many forms of it. The most common one is when a salesman has one too many customers at the same time and turns his customer to another salesman to work. They split the deal between them.

When I came up in the business you were in no way allowed to work two deals at the same time. To do so was to risk the wrath of a highly pissed-off sales manager who might very well take the second customer from you completely. So if you were with an appointment and a be-back came in, you had to find another salesman to work the second deal for you.

It’s a common courtesy to turn a deal to the guy who upped your customer, but that isn’t always practical. If the other salesman is dumber than a bag of hammers you have to do some serious soul searching before you give the deal up. A half a deal might turn into no deal! Most salesmen have at least one buddy on the crew with whom he can turn deals back and forth. It’s usually a guy who has a similar temperament so the customer doesn’t go into shock when that nice guy he came to see turned him to a prick!

Unlike my friend Jim, the turning salesman usually tries to make sure that the guy who takes your turn is not going to be jacked-off by a mooch. I’ve known plenty of guys who will turn the more promising deal if they can. But The Others are an unpredictable lot so when a guy takes a turn it’s with the knowledge that he’s taking a chance.

Here’s an oddity. I once worked at a place where the salesmen were allowed to work as many deals at one time as they wanted. I was shocked. In my humble opinion the sales manager was a complete idiot. I once watched in horror as a guy tried to work four customers at one time while I, who wasn’t doing anything at the time and likes to think is qualified to take a turn, was ignored. At least one of his customers left in disgust while the manager did nothing!

One good way to get abused when taking a turn is something called a “Hello T.O.”. In this scenario the offending salesman (the same guy who skated you last week) gets an up, spends five minutes qualifying him, and turns him to you like he’d been working the mooch for a week. Usually he turns the deal because he smells a mini, so he’d rather get half from you while he tries to find a big dummy with a way to go.

Experienced salesmen are always on the lookout for a Hello T.O. When taking a turn from a suspicious character, it’s best to ask the customer a few questions about how long his relationship has been with the offending salesman. As the saying goes, “Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice shame on me!”

Usually when a deal is turned, the two salesmen are “married”. At some dealerships both the deals have to be split to insure fairness, but that is the exception not the rule. Being married means that if I turn a deal to you, finish my first deal, and get a fresh deal while you’re still with the customer I turned you, I have to put you on that new deal. Sometimes on a busy weekend day you can end up being married to a guy for the whole day!

Many times a deal is turned while it’s at the desk. This usually happens when the salesman can’t get the deal done for some reason. He’s been with the customer for three hours, taken him down to the ten yard line, but can’t seem to get that final bump that will send him into the end zone. At this point it’s advantageous to turn the deal to another salesman because it’s an amazing how even just a change of face can breathe fresh life into a dying deal.

I have a bitch here. A deal should almost always be turned to another qualified salesman. Only as a last resort should a manager go in for the close. Why? First, a manager who regularly goes in to close a deal makes his salesmen weak and dependent on the manager. We Car Men can be a lazy bunch. Why should we bust his balls for that final bump when the sales manager will do it for free? Second, because they have the power to do anything they want, managers will sometimes give away the farm to make a deal. Third, many managers just aren’t not good closers. You wouldn’t send a salesman in cold to do the F&I man’s job, so what makes you think the F&I guy can close your deal?

Exception: In my opinion there is nothing more inspiring for a salesman than seeing a sales manger in a desperate situation get off his ass, grab the write-up and hammer a customer. IF USED SPARINGLY, it reminds the crew that the sales manager really could sell cars if he wanted to and is not afraid to get his hands dirty for the sake of his crew.

I remember standing outside the dealership that Saturday evening contemplating the significance of Jim’s shitty turn. I felt bad. I mean, if we can’t trust each other who can we trust? It’s good to remember that ultimately we are all in the same boat, and watching out for the other guy can pay for him and for you.

Always remember the rule: What goes around comes around.


Talk to you later,


David


P.S. I used so many cliché expressions while writing this piece someone ought to confiscate my keyboard!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well written. Signed, The Wife and Boy.

Robert Linkonis Sr. said...

Hi David,

I remember the days of training (using) the "new guy". A green pea was usually good for at least a couple of halves before they got smart.

Nothing like the first "up" on a Saturday morning, when after getting out of a Dodge Caravan, they flippantly inform you that they have just started their vehicle selection process.

"This time, we are not sure if we want another mini-van, an SUV or a full size sedan. We want to spend today fully researching every one of your models before we continue our comparison at the next dealership".

Upon hearing this, most veteran car guys might decide that it's time for "junior" to cut his teeth, and go find the new guy.

"Hey Tom, I need your help" one might say to the new guy.

"I've got a customer on his way in and I think you're ready. Let me introduce you to some nice folks. Update me on your progress and when you close them, just put me on the back of the deal".

Then after putting Tom on autopilot, one would light up a cigarette with the rest of the car guys on the point.

Ahhh... memories.


Good stuff lately, I hope you have a great 2009!


AFI

David Teves said...

Abusing Green Peas has been the national past time of Car Men for ages. For the Green Pea, it's a right of passage of sorts, equivalent to your old man throwing you into the deep end of the pool to teach you how to swim. As they say, what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger.

David